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Monday, August 16, 2010

Good Things Happen

It's been a long weekend, but a wonderful one. My daughter got married Saturday. One down, seven more to go. My parents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary Sunday. I finally checked my email late Sunday night to find more good news. I sold another story to an anthology and I was awarded this:

Thanks to Ruth E. Day for the award. Here's her post.
I'll save the rest of the award stuff for later, I'm still recovering!

I've been thinking a lot about marriage lately, for obvious reasons. I'm closing in on my 25th anniversary next February. I'm more in love with my husband now than I was then. He's my best friend. I can share anything with him. That doesn't happen automatically. It requires effort and commitment, and a lot of patience.

So here's my two bits of marriage advice.
1. Marriage requires more than love, it requires commitment. If you truly want a lasting marriage, you're going to have to work at keeping it together. It's worth it.
2. An old Irish blessing states, "Let there be spaces in your togetherness." True love does not require that you spend every second of every day for the rest of eternity watching each other breathe. It does not require that you both love the same things. Give your spouse space to be an individual as well as your partner. Let the wind blow between you occasionally. True love fosters trust and integrity. Those times apart can help renew your relationship.

I have to talk about writing in here somewhere, I am an author, too. I quit reading romances for two reasons. They end before the relationship really gets interesting and more and more, they are anti-marriage. I believe deeply in the institution of marriage. It is a good thing. I also enjoy a good romance. My series has a romance as a major subplot. It's not just about falling in love, it's about building a relationship that can withstand trouble. It's about trust and family and friendship.

Okay. Enough of being Dear Abby. I'll think of something silly for next week's post. Humor is a necessary part of life.


  1. I don't read much by way of romances, but from what I have seen, I agree. Most romantic plots have to do with the first stages of a relationship, and very few seem to focus on the friendship that is the bedrock of every successful romantic relationship. But then, I've noticed that a lot of people don't bother to go through the friend stage before falling in love -- so maybe that's part of the problem.

  2. Marriage is work, but worth the effort. I agree.

    Glad the wedding went well. You had a busy weekend. Woot on the sale! Excellent!

  3. The first stages are exciting, true, but the real payoff is later when the relationship is fully developed. At least I think so.

    Thanks, Mary. My daughter started off right. She picked a real keeper. We're happy to welcome him to our family. Except my youngest kids were sad that they aren't going to move into our house now. They don't quite get the idea that when you're married, you start your own house and family. Changes are hard at my house, but we'll work through it.

  4. Congrats to the new an old hands at marriage! lol. I agree, marriage is work, but very much worth the effort.

    Doe-eyed gazing into each others eyes get old and more than a little cavity-inducing. I like a bit more realism in my human interactions.


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